Monday, February 9, 2015

Family Research


The past month or so I have been devoting most of my time doing genealogy.  My Mom left me 2 boxes of papers.,.letters, handwritten notes, and a few mysteries to try and solve.  She had to do this the hard way.  No computer, no car to drive to libraries...just the United States Post Office.  Somehow she was able to find out who to write letters to to get copies of birth and death certificates, and whatever else she was looking for.   She started doing her research in 1977 with my Aunt Helen.  I am sure that Aunt Helen took her places to do the research because she had a car.  Aunt Helen died in 1984.  After that, I think my brothers or Dad and occasionally me.. would take her places.  There is very little order in all her items.  But I am having so much fun going through all of it.   She did some journaling....and a lot of that is depressing.  I have run across a few things that have made me laugh for about 15 minutes.  She used to clip newspaper articles....usually Ann Landers.  Talking about personal things in my family was rare.  If she wanted to send me a message about my behavior or some advice she had for me...she would leave Ann Landers articles in my room.  It was really hard for my Mom to share her feelings.  She had a hard time when she growing up.  Her Mom died when she was 5 and her sister was 2.  My grandpa couldn't work and take care of them, so they were sent to foster homes and relatives every year until my grandpa married a widow with 5 kids of her own.  She never felt like her step-mother liked her and her sister.  I don't think my mom ever felt loved or wanted.



 Early in her marriage to Dad, the pictures tell a love story.  Finally...she had a home with love in it.  My Dad started drinking too much and the happy smiles and shows of affection stopped.  She survived it...though and their marriage was pretty solid for the remainder of their lives.  One time she told me.. he told her that she was his best friend.   That's how it should be in the end...
Back to my research for now.....

9 comments:

sandy said...

i was surprised - i came by and you had opened the blog up again - nice to see a post. I enjoyed reading this and once in awhile I bring out a box with a lot of memories written down by my dad and grandpa. It's bittersweet going through them. Hope all is well with the grand girls - how are they doing?

Reader Wil said...

How sad when a child loses its mum and never felt loved after this.
To be your partner's best friend is wonderful!
Have a great weekend, Brenda!
Wil, ABCW Team.

The Bug said...

I think in general the previous generation led a harder life than we did (or at least in my case - can't speak for you). My mom's childhood was pretty hard too...

sandy said...

i was going back into my blog - into last year and was amazed how many times you commented and i didn't know it. Some how for awhile until i noticed it, google did something and i stopped getting notifications in my email so i didn't know you had commented. Anyway, thanks for all your comments in the past. I thought you were lost to us in blogland because i couldn't get to your blog. so glad you are still around and hope to see more posts from you. i was back into last summer and noticed comments from you.

Winifred said...

I feel like I've had a much easier life than my parents & grandparents. We've been blessed not have the wars they went through, better housing, working conditions, a decent national health service & holidays they could never have imagined.
Your Mam did have a hard time, mine did too although not when she was very young.
I hope you keep going with the family research, it's lovely that she left you all those things.

Brenda said...

Thanks for the comments ladies. It feels good to reconnect with all of you.
Sandi....the grand girls are in school now. Maddie is in 1st grade and Kayla in pre-primary. They go all day. I still have them occasionaly on their days off...and last summer. Bet your kiddos are getting big!

Wil....I may try and join your ABCW Team. I like the idea of having a subject to write about.

Dana,
Life was very different in the 30's and 40's and 50's. I was a teen in the crazy 60's. Ha..

Winifred,
Glad you started blogging again also. I guess we all need a break everyonce in awhile. I love reading about life in other countries...since I may never get to visit any of them. It means a lot to me when you and Wil share about your areas.

Reader Wil said...

Hi Brenda! That would be wonderful if you can join us. Please do contact Roger. He can tell you what is expected of you!
Good luck and have a great week.

sandy said...

Happy spring Brenda! Hope to see a new post from yuo soon ...is that subtle, lol. I miss your posts and seeing photos of the girls. We just got back from Bend and yes those kids are getting big!

Winifred said...

Hello Brenda

I haven't been able to get into your bogs in recent months, no idea why but a message kept telling me it was private.

Finally I have managed to do it.

Would love to know how you & your family are doing.

Clifford 1994 to 2009

Clifford   1994 to 2009
The Best Dog Ever